Sunday, July 10, 2011

ME!

This me is the me that I can be.
The only be I can be is the me I am.
But you make it so hard to be the me
I need to be.
Why can't I just be me and you be happy?
Why is being me so hard because I care so much?
Being me is all I know to be.

Friday, July 8, 2011

All I can say is... WTH?

First you need to visit this site to understand my ramblings this time...

I do not understand this at all. First I think the media needs to change the focus of this story. Instead of focusing on this overweight women who is doing this to herself just for money you need to be focusing on the fact that her child is probably being neglected. And by probably I mean in my eyes the kid totally is, but I am not there, so I could be wrong.

If she is needing a 4 year old to feed her (why the heck can't she lift her arms and feed herself?), prepare her foods, bath herself, etc then more than likely the little girl does these things for herself as well as her mother... And a 4 year old preparing foods, etc is not okay in my eyes. A 4 year old needs to have a childhood and caring for her mother is taking that a way from her. Why has no one stepped in and taken this little girl away?

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Creating Me!

A lot of people talk about not finding themselves. I am one of those people. I have said it countless times. “I haven’t found myself yet”. But I recently discovered that most people don’t always find themselves for one reason or another. Instead you need to create yourself… And to do so you just need to go after what you love.

Finding yourself means you are just letting things happen… if they happen they happen, but if they don’t you will always been lost. Creating yourself means you are deciding who you want to be, where you want to go, what you want to do… and then you do it! There is nothing to find… there is only living, loving, learning, and doing.

After many years of not knowing what to do with my life I have finally decide it is time to create me… the me I want to be! And if I try something I don’t like then oh well I learned something from it. Heck with trying tp find the one thing I am mean to do… I am going to do it all. So, starting today I am creating a new me!

Worrying vs. living

Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.

I have a hard time letting things go. If something hits my mind it is there... I can't stop worrying, I can't stop fearing, I can't stop obsessing over it. I hate this about me… Life is short.,. shorter than short. Tomorrow is never a given. Tomorrow may only exist in your dreams… dream you may not wake up from. Yet, I spend so much of my time worrying, fearing, dreading, and panicking.

I really need to learn how to just stop this and live for the moment. It is a goal of mine and I have to reach it to reach full happiness b/c if I don’t stop worrying I am going to kill myself (meaning I worry so much the stress is causing my heart to act up problems).

But how do I stop something I have done my whole life?

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Love

"Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished."

I find this to be very true with a lot of people. They are so many people out there that want this ideal life. You know the one… A perfect husband, 2 kids, a cute cottage house with the white picket fence and a dog.

Realistically things take time, work, etc. You have the find the "one" that can work with you to have that idea love. The only problem is, people want instant gratification... They want to start dating someone and that person be the one even if they are not. You will rush into a marriage even though the relationship is rocking just to get to an idea life that will never be real because marriage is hard and if things are perfect and if the love isn't real then you will only be punishing yourself for doing so. The marriage will more than likely fail causing you to go through the pain of a divorce, the years spent with Mr./Mrs. wrong could have been years spent finding and/or being with Mr/Mrs Right.

"Fantasy love is much better than reality love. Never doing it is very exciting. The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet."


I wanted to add that quote because I feel that if you are not in your idea relationship then you should make a fantasy one. Have something great in your fantasy land would be so much more fun and better than having something bad in your realistic land. Just remember when looking for your soul mate that fantasies are just that… Fantasy! Do not make your expectations so high or lame that no one can meet then and leave you alone and unhappy.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Happy 4th of July!

Today marks the day of America's independence... The day we as Americans, declared our independence, from the Kingdom of Great Britain. We celebrate with cookouts, vacations, family get togethers, camping, just relaxing, and of course fireworks!

I hope each of you had a wonderful and safe 4th of July today!

Saturday, June 18, 2011

I still suck

Okay so I have a ton of majorly awesome blog post idea but with having 4 kids it is next to impossible to blog lately! And yes if you know me and just read that you probably thought "4 kids, what?". But for the last 2+ months (9 weeks now) I have had 4 kids. We gained 2 children ages 4 and 8 months... although he will be 11 months old tomorrow! So having 4 kids 5 and under will keep you busy. And I was already busy! I do plan on starting crafty post again as I have been doing a lot of projects with the kids lately. Stay tuned because they will be up shortly!

Friday, June 10, 2011

Blog is fixed!!!

Woohoo, I have had some great blog post topic ideas but for the past month or so my blog has not worked for WEEKS now! I have tried and tried to blog but couldn't... it was so very annoying. But I am back... and very happy to be back. Let my blogging start back up!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

A Randomly Rambling Post

So yes, I do randomly talk to myself... A lot actually! My friends, who have known me for years, still laugh at me because I talk to myself... and they catch me! So, since a lot of things are on my mind tonight I thought I was just make a blog post... After all I haven't made one in forever and a day.

# 1: I am still upset that 'Iron Man' by Black Sabbath was not in the movie Iron Man!!! Seriously this upsets me!

# 2: Taking the easy way out of things only makes your life boring... Yes it may be easier but life is massively boring this way and you do not learn your true strengh.

# 3: I love lighting. It is so pretty... And no matter how hard I try I just cannot get a photograph of lighting :(

# 4: Being an adult is so much more than just an age! I know people 25, 35, 45, even 55 who I would not consider an adult... Grow up people! Take responsibility for your actions... Do the right thing... Change the world for the better.

#5: I am super girl and I am here to save the world... dum, dum, dum.... Not sure why that just popped in my head but it did... so I typed it out :)

# 6: Hmmmmmm.. What is going on with my blogger? I go to publish the post and it just doesn't publish. Dang it!

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Day 10

Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.


Okay, yes, this could possibily be the lamest paint picture ever! But I didn't have any pictures of me & my one of my bestest friends Lisa... And we do a lot of messed up things together!!!! So, I made one... quickly!!!!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Day 08

Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.


A photo of Willow... That always makes me laugh! She did not want to sit there for her pictures to be taken... And was clearly expressing that!

Monday, March 21, 2011

Day 07

Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item.


This little piece of paper is one of my most treasured items! Because it was wrote by my 5-year old Autistic child... Who wasn't supposed to be even talking at this point, yet is one of the top readers in all of the kinder classes at her school... As well as a non-stop talker! When she handed me this piece of paper she said "moma which sentence do you like better?". I of course said "the I love you sentence" and then asked what the top one said & she said "its nonsense, I just wanted to say I love you!".

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Day 06

Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.


I would love to be the little me again... I want to relive my childhood... I didn't have one! I wish I had. I missed out on so very much.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Day 05

Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.


My daughter's' first trip to the beach... Lots of memories made, but seeing their faces when they saw the ocean for the first time, and make a sand castle that they stomped through... priceless!

Friday, March 18, 2011

Day 04

Day 04 - A picture of a habit you wish you didn’t have....


I wish I didn't eat out of habit... boredom... stress... etc!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Day 03

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.

I just love this show... and the books too!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Day 02

A picture of you and a person you have been close with for awhile.

This is a cheesy picture of me & my uncle Wayne. He is 53 years old & has Down Syndrom, which is pretty darn amazing!!! He is like my little brother and I have watched over him since I was 16.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Day 01

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.


1. I have no willpower to succeed at the things I want most because of inter demons
2. My ears are gauged to an 8g now, but I am thinking of going to a 6 or 4
3. I am 5'3"
4. I have two daughters, Clover & Willow.
5. My bucket list is more of a to do before I am 35 list
6. I love my VW beetle, who's name is BetyBug!
7. At this very moment, I am cold.
8. I love my grandma, cousin Chelsey, brother & nephews!
9. I just got a new puppy, who my girls named Scarley Sparkles
10.I stay online to much... Darn phones with the internet!!!
11.I love to text!!! Wanna chat? Text me! :)
12.I love tacos
13.I used to love to dance in the rain... but not so much now!
14.I need more hours in the day to do the things I NEED and WANT to do
15.Just listed some really lame facts about myself!

30 day challenge

So, I haven't been blogging that often anymore... Why? Because my life has became a crazy stir of insanity! My oldest daughter Clover just spent the last 6 weeks very sick.. And trust me, you don't want me to go into that, because its a lot! So, anyways, since I do well with blogging under the pressures of challenges I have decided to do another 30 day Challenge! Below are the details.

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for awhile.
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.
Day 04 - A picture of a habit you wish you didn’t have....
Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.
Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.
Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item.
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.
Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.
Day 12 - A picture of something you love.
Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.
Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.
Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.
Day 17 - A picture of someone that has made a huge impact on your life recently.
Day 18 - A picture of something that you are scared of.
Day 19 - A picture of you when you were little.
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.
Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at.
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.
Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change.
Day 25 - A picture of your day.
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.
Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of.
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Bigfoot... Bigfoot... Bigfoot! Real or Legend?

Okay, let me start off by saying... I AM A SAP! For real, I am the biggest sucker ever... I can be convinced into believing just about anything. Not really for sure if this would be a good or bad thing. I believe in ghost, the loch ness monster, aliens, etc... But to be honest I never really thought all that much about Bigfoot!

Could he be out there in the woods somewhere? Sure! Why not? I mean people hide out all of the time... unseen, unheard, unwanted, etc. Why couldn't there be a group of tall, hairy big footed creatures out there hiding from our BS (war, greed, etc)?

My new found intrest is coming from the fact that some guy in my town has decided to go on a Bigfoot hunt this weekend... Don't believe me? Just click here, here or here (yep, those are 3 different stories on it! For the last link you will need to scroll down the page some).

I mean this the nicest way possible, but dang the hunt is so not a good idea! Guns, large groups of people who beleive in bigfoot, possible drinking, wooded areas, and over excited to find bigfoot people is not a good mix!

I better stop rambling about this because I am sure I could go on and on and on... but I will leave you with a totally awesome bigfoot song! :)

Well, thats all for now folks,
~Lissa Lou

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Join for FREE

This is super cool, because you can actually join for FREE... I hate it when you have to pay to join a company and then never make any money but the company makes money off you... So, this was perfect for me.

Yep, you read that correctly... You can join for FREE what is expected to be the fastest growing Women’s Internet Company in history with Bamboopink by JudeFrances. Affordable jewelry line made and designed by a famous, high-end designer whose current line is sold in upscale department stores! This company is the first of its kind. There are no parties to host and no phone calls to make.

Just visit:
https://www.bamboopink.net/melissastarr
My Consultant ID # is:5701

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Life... Unexpected and fast!

I love to write... I love to blog... I love a lot of things I don't get to do as I wish I could. Life is always fast, busy and even a little crazy... okay, okay sometimes A LOT CRAZY!

Lets see, since my last post we have battled strep throat not once but twice, the flu, a stomach virus, a cold and I had walking pneumonia too! Let me just say that if me or my girls get sick anymore this winter I am bubble wrapping my house! And no, I am not joking about the bubble wrap! :)

I was in a wedding on Feb. 12th. It was a beautiful wedding. Both of my girls were in it as well, and they were totally cheesey but everyone said they made the wedding fun and they wouldn't forget the girls... Although, Willow gave the bride away (she didn't really, but when the preacher asked "Who gives this woman into marriage?" Willow quickly and loudly answered "ME!"), they sang "Jesus Loves Me" when the preacher said "Jesus brought this couple together" and made "snow angels" in the rose petals. This wasn't all that they did, but the funniest stuff :) Here is a picture of me from the wedding... I really should have smiled.

I am still on my diet... And still losing! Although the last two weeks have sucked, sadly! It is my fault and I should have worked harder, but I slacked for the wedding and the scale paid the price... No, I did not gain, but I haven't lost as much as I would have liked. I am stepping back up my game tomorrow though! And I think I might even have breakfast tomorrow morning... Weight Control Oatmeal. :)

What else is new? hmmmmmm... I am thinking really hard! Oh Clover is reading very well now... I had a meeting this week with her teachers, the principal, etc and she is "Well Above Average". How awesome is that? My little Autistic child is not only beating Autism, but totally rocking in school!!! Yes, I am bragging here... but I am so very proud of her! On the down side, she is being sent back to the pediatric neurologist to have more testing done... She may be having "focal seizures" as well.

Now thinking to see if there is anything else... I am in the process of giving my bedroom a makeover! I will post before and after pictures soon! Right now my bedroom is plain jane, boring and kinda empty! Which isn't me at all... I like color! I also like little things that tell who you are when someone walks into a room... So, yea, not that many people walk into my room, but since I want my bedroom to scream me and right now it just doesn't... I think I am going to paint it not this coming weekend but the next.

Lastly, I am gauging my ears again! I just started so I am only on 6g (stated at 20g or 22g... not sure which since my ears have been pierced since I was 2 weeks old). Not sure how long I will stay at a 6g... but I am thinking a while... I just don't know if I want to go bigger. Oh I bought tickets this week to the Carolina Rebellion Concert... Which I have to admit I am totally excited about!!!! This might just be the coolest concert of my life!!!!

Uhm, I do believe that is about all folks... But I do promise I am going to try really hard to start blogging a few times a week again! I need too... because I really want too!

Until next time... Peace, Love and rock-n-roll :)
~Lissa Lou

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Fighting the endless battle!

So, it is safe to safe the best diet I have ever been on up until this point of my life is the "wisdom teeth extraction" diet... haha! But in all seriousness, I have lost 7 lbs since Monday night... That is crazy to me... Plus it puts me at a weigh I haven't been at in nearly 2 years (2 years in March). I remember my weight 2 years ago in March because I had weighed in for a friendly "biggest loser" challenge between a few friends and myself... Instead of losing I slowly started to gain weight and ended up weighing 16.5 lbs more before I stopped gaining... And that was by far the heaviest I had ever been... A weight I thought I would NEVER be! I still cannot believe I weighed that much, but I vowel today that I will never get that heavy again.

But back to the point of this post... As noted in an earlier post I have had issues with eating disorders for a while and with having my wisdom teeth removed I haven't been eating (if I make it to 300 calories for the day I am doing great!) and the weight is falling off me quickly, which only sets me up because now I do not want to eat again... Last night I ate mashed potatoes with a little gravy (120 calories) and I couldn't get over eating them... I got upset, wanted to vomit and could not let the fact that I just ate go. It ate at me for hours. Yet I only had 320 calories yesterday, so I know it was stupid to think I needed to vomit... Yet I want to reach my goal weight and know how easy it can be... if I just didn't eat! I still have a few days before I can start eating so I know its going to get harder.

~Lissa Lou

Friday, January 7, 2011

I forgot... I have pages now!

Yesterday I added two pages onto my blog... One is for my new Project 365 post and the other is about my weight loss journey... I decided to do the pages instead of just add post here so it wasn't to repetitive and if you wanted to just see photos, you could easily do so without going through all of my blog post... Or if you just want dieting tips, see my struggles, my success, my workouts, etc you can without all of the other stuff.

On a side note I will keep posting some dieting post here just so my "weight loss page" is not overly lenghty, and packed together with way to much clutter on the page. With that said I wanted to give a few of my dieting thoughts for today.

"Have the courage to act on your dreams - leave behind you the internal forces that hold you back." With my new diet I am leaving behind a huge internal battle and finding my courage to live out my dreams. Dreams that I have wanted to live out for years... maybe in a lifetime but have never been able too... dreams that will complete me... dreams that needed to be lived instead of just dreamed. Are you living your dreams?


~Lissa Lou

Totally Bummed

Okay so I apparently lost my camera battery charger some time ago and have yet to find it... Where could it be? I have searched everywhere and it hasn't turned up. I am thinking I may have forgotten it at the beach back in October. This totally bums me out too because my camera battery died a week or two before Christmas and I have been using my little pocket camera for my pictures... Which of course is not as good! :) I must find my charger... MUST!

I also need to go down to my basement and clean it out... It has been a mess now for well over eighteen-months, and it needs to be clean and organized... Whatever I no longer want I will be yard-selling and that profit is going toward either our next vacation or a new camera lens... Not sure which, lol. I guess it will depend on where we decide to go to for vacation this year... It is still in debates and we really should be making a decision soon.

Oh I just realized it is Friday... YAY for Friday! Now if I can make it through today quickly so I can get on with my weekend... Although, it is not like I am actually going to do anything this weekend. Lay around and rest some more. My cheeks are still pretty swollen from having my wisdom teeth extracted.

Well I better get off here... I am going to try and get a few things done for my girl scout troop. So, thats all for now... I know boring post, but I wanted to post something since I spent weeks slacking :)

Peace, love & cupcakes,
Lissa Lou

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Where in the world is Lissa Lou?!?

Lame title I know, but when I opened blogger the show/song "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego" popped into my head, and bam my title for this post was formed.

I have been meaning to make a post every day for the few weeks, but haven't found the time or energy. I finally got around to having all 4 of my wisdom teeth extracted this week (on Tuesday Jan. 04th). Still healing... And very hungry!!! I didn't eat on Monday because I was to nervous and knew I would just get sick from eating, and I haven't been able to eat since having it done. All I know is when I weigh myself on Monday morning that scale better show a weight loss!

Now that the holidays are over and a new year year has started I have set big goals for myself... Okay, not really goals or big... but they will bring a lot of new changes to my life and make me a better person. :)

These are pretty simple changes such as getting back into my photography, crafty, camping, hiking, etc... Things that just get me out more so I am not so stressed and forgetting who I am. They are some bigger changes to be made such as losing weight, getting back to the gym, and actually following through with all of my goals, lol.

I guess that is all for now... my pain pills are starting to kick in and I think I am going to take a nap... I need a nap because haven't been sleeping so well.

Until my next post
Peace, Love and cupcakes,
~Lissa Lou :)